Way past time actually. I’ve been in a season of loss for years. I don’t care to review it all here, but suffice it to say significant family members, income, pets and things that were important to me are gone. I’ve grieved and grieved and focused almost constantly on what was lost or stolen. I’m in what I call my ‘season of Job’. I failed to inventory and focus on what I have to be thankful for.
I’m tired of grief. I’m tired of the constant reminders of all the loss and pain. It dawned on me yesterday that I’m the one that keeps me in that grief place. I think, given all that’s happened it’s ok to grieve…but it’s not ok to stay there. I teach and preach perspective but I forgot to counsel myself. Another reminder is that it’s so easy to help others and so hard to apply the same principles to ourselves. The effort is enormous which surely gives me a fresh compassion for others. So it’s all good.
I refuse to be ungrateful. I refuse to be a pitiful, grief-stricken person…and I see I’m the only one who can change my state of mind. Life is too short to be miserable. God has brought me through way too much to succum to misery.
Is it easy? No, not when the loss column holds more than the gain. But it can be done. I will be grateful. I’ll thank God for having survived. I’ll seek the lessons in this season and I’ll be a better person for them. Every time a sorrowful thought for what’s now my past attempts to creep in I’ll snag it and flip it for good. I’m not a victim! I’m a victorious warrior with all the scars to prove it but they will not mar my heart. I hope you make the same decision.